Sexting can be some risky business. Play your cards right and you’ll be getting some, but one wrong move and you’ll be getting some… nudes leaked on the Internet. Yikes.

So how do you sext successfully? Here’s some helpful tips.

1. Sexting before sex is pretty much a non-starter.

First thing’s first, because for some reason we have to say it – don’t sext someone you haven’t already slept with. Seriously, on the list of bad opening lines, sexting is pretty much rock bottom and a guarantee that you won’t get an answer. Whether they’re a stranger you just met last night or someone you’ve been flirting with, you need to get physical before you go digital. Don’t be a creep.

Further, do you really want to sleep with someone who actually responds to random sexting? You might want to rethink your approach there.

2. Avoid txt-speak staples

Emojis? Weird. Eggplants and water droplets are funny, not sexy.

Emoticons? Unnatural, although, somehow the old-school 😉 still works. It’s a timeless classic, I guess.

And in general, don’t text anything like omg ur so hott, im so wett omg, etc. Spell your words out, use punctuation and talk like an adult, or else you’ll sound like a horny preteen. And there’s nothing sexy about that.

3. Actually have a conversation

Don’t just jump into it. Demanding pictures and getting right into the nitty-gritty isn’t much of a turn on. Let the conversation build with a natural ebb-and-flow. Remember, you’re texting a real-live human being, not some kind of tit-pic vending machine. Take your time or else you’re just wasting time.

4. Keep it simple, stupid

Okay, so you’ve committed to acting like a normal person and not some sex-starved monkey at a typewriter. Nice work – just be careful not to get carried away there, Shakespeare.

There’s a “less-is-more” truism to pretty much all of the written word, and it rings true in sexting as well. Your goal is arousal, so maybe writing a novel isn’t the best idea. The more elaborate your free sexting gets, the less effective it will be.

Avoid ridiculous exaggeration too. You’re shooting for erotica, not science fiction.


Here’s a strategy that has never worked ever. The more intimate aspects of the female anatomy photograph brilliantly. The inverse, however, is not true at all.

No girl wants to see a picture of your dick. If she does, it’s to send it to her friends for a laugh or to post it on the internet. In general, keeping shots from the waist up is your best bet if you’re in shape. If not, it’s probably best to keep it verbal.

But seriously. No dick pics. It’s pretty much a 100 percent fail-rate. Don’t do it.

…And because some of you need to be told this, no ball pics either. Seriously, what are you thinking?